Wednesday, September 14, 2011

A LETTER from RICK PERRY

Take a look at this from the borowitzreport:

" A Letter from Rick Perry

Dear American,
For the last few weeks, I've been under constant attack. My opponents would have you believe that if I'm elected, you'll be stripped of your Social Security benefits and will be scrounging for food in dumpsters with all the desperation of a feral cat.
Of course, that's true. But what they don't tell you is what I'd replace Social Security with: an amazing new program I like to call PerryCare.
Under PerryCare, you'll receive all the food, clothing and shelter you need, and it wont cost a dime in taxes. How is that possible? Simple: you'll be praying for all those things.
As a PerryCare recipient, each week you'll receive in your e-mail box a PerryCare PrayerMail, giving you an easy to recite prayer for the bread , milk, cat food or whatever else you need to survive. It's like a Groupon from God.
PerryCare is more than a replacement for that infernal Ponzi scheme that has bamboozled Americans with regular monthly checks for 75 years. It is part of my larger plan to return prayer to its rightful place in American life. I get down on my knees every night and I promise you, if I am elected your President, I will bring this entire country to its knees.
I expect that some of my opponents will laugh at my plan, especially that lawn gnome Ron Paul and Michele " Crazy Eyes Bachmann. Fine, let them laugh! Laughter is the best medicine. And, if I am elected, there will be no other medicine.
That brings me to my PerryCare medical plan, which will replace Medicare once I consign that Ponzi scheme to the electric chair of history. I don't have enough time to go into the whole plan right now, but here it is in two words : single prayer.
Your next President

Gov. Rick Perry"

C'mon now. It's really kind of funny and not so far removed from reality. So have a mild laugh.

CraigS

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

LOL....passing this one on. Its a keeper. Thanks CraigS.

Lori*

Anonymous said...

"Mild" laugh? This post is screamingly funny!

Borowitz has nailed Perry 100%. Laughter may be the best medicine, because its skillful surgeon -- satire -- will always identify and root out the cancer. The operation may take a little while, but I refuse to believe that the majority of American voters are as gullible and unperceptive as the Perry team seems to think.

Thank you, CraigS, for lightening up the discourse with this brilliant post.

Joe said...

Saul Anuzis endoorsing Mitt - http://www.thatssaulfolks.com/2011/09/15/mitt-romney-for-president-my-endorsement/

Anonymous said...

Funny stuff Craig.