Saving the planet is hard work.
The Brazilian rainforest is so endangered that the latest UN climate conference will take place there. Along the way to saving the planet, a four lane highway had to be cut through tens of thousands of acres of protected and endangered rainforest. Endangered by its protectors.
(But the good news, according to the Brazilian government, is that it’s a “sustainable highway.)
And if that’s not enough, fleets of jets will soon descend on the Brazilian rainforest as an estimated 45,000 attendees will show up to party, socialize, conference, and listen to lectures about how this time the planet is really on the edge of destruction. Please pass the canapes.
COP30, as the conference is known, hasn’t saved the planet in 29 conferences, but maybe the 30th one will do the trick, at least if the delegates can find someplace to stay in the rainforest.
The Brazilian government is announcing that individual rooms are available for planet-savers from other countries for as high as $600. Over the summer, the UN held ‘emergency talks’ not over saving the planet, but over the cost of hotel rooms to save the planet from $600 rooms.
‘Poorer’ African nations warned that they couldn’t afford the cost of the hotel rooms (but they can usually afford gold watches, elaborate palaces and private armies) and would not come unless the costs came down. With the fate of the planet at stake, UN negotiators held several ‘urgent’ meetings to discuss plans for lowering the costs of a hotel room to save the planet.
Unfortunately the only way to lower the costs of the planet-saving hotel rooms would be chopping down even more rainforest to build more hotel rooms. Sometimes you have to destroy the rainforest to save the rainforest, or destroy the rainforest to make it cheaper to host African delegates to discuss saving the rainforest from umm… the people destroying the rainforest.
By then it was too late to build new hotels, but two massive cruise ships were dispatched to the Brazilian rainforest to provide African delegates with cheap cabins to stay in. For the planet.
The MSC Seaview, a 1,000 foot cruise ship with 18 decks, massive pool, four-story glass-walled atrium, disco, theater and full-sized bowling alleys, and the Costa Diadema, that has a 4D theater, a spa across 4 decks and a crew of over 1,000, were dispatched to save the planet by hosting the African diplomats to discuss reducing emissions from things like cruise ships.
It would take the average person 100 years to produce as many ‘emissions’ as these cruise ships do in one hour. But sometimes you just have to pollute to stop polluting the planet.
These cabins on cruise ships going nowhere (an apt metaphor for both the UN and its serial climate conferences, currently up to 30 and counting) will be going for a mere $220.
While the Africans were appeased, the Europeans were still furious over the high price of hotel rooms and refused to book rooms at $600 a night. Not even for the sake of saving the planet.
The Brazilian government rushed to find cheaper motels and Airbnbs to save the conference and thus save the planet, and the Europeans relented, but cut back their delegations so that fewer diplomats will be coming to save the planet. And that might actually save the planet. --->READ MORE HERE
The great and the good have descended on the hot and steamy Brazilian town of Belem to discuss the world’s climate problem at COP 30 - and escorts in the city are planning to cash in once the highbrow talks finish in the evening.
An influx of high-class sex workers have checked into hotels and rented Airbnb’s for the jamboree, which will begin in earnest on Monday with more than 50,000 delegates expected to attend the two-week junket on the edge of the Amazon jungle.
And like the annual get together in the Swiss resort of Davos some of them will be turning their minds on how to relax after a long day putting the global environment on track they will be looking to relax.
One escort agency based in this north easten region – SexyNorte- said it had seen a spike in adverts from women in the days leading up to the start of the conference - which held a curtain raiser last week attended by Prince William and PM Keir Starmer.
The Daily Mail spoke to one woman on the site called Angel, who had flown in from Fortaleza 900 miles away, who was happy to meet up at a café overlooking the River Guama and discuss her job over a cappuccino.
Looking chic and stylish in her designer clothes and black luxury handbag, Angel – who charges £250 an hour - said:’ I’m here for a month, and I’m expecting to make some good money.
‘The people attending COP30 will be intelligent and will be looking for conversation with a like-minded person and they will find that with me; I am a luxury escort not a street prostitute with a pimp.
‘I know how to behave in high society, and I am comfortable in all situations from formal dinners to cocktail receptions and I have a glamorous wardrobe that will suit any occasion.’
Thanks to her Germanic ancestors, Angel is tall, has flowing blonde hair and deep blue eyes – setting her apart from the local women and was able to speak in almost perfect English.
On her NorteSexy page her biography adds:’ Angel, a luxury escort who doesn’t go unnoticed, originally from Rio Grande do Sul, with German decadency. --->READ MORE HERE
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