Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Op-ed: Gay marriage...the issue de jour

 
Op-ed:
Gay marriage...the issue de jour
By: Diane Sori
 
A hot button topic...a social controversy I NEVER wanted to get involved in or speak about but am being forced to by recent developments in the news.
 
The issue of gay marriage (same sex marriage) has been pushed front and center as the Supreme Court just heard a case involving Proposition 8 that could drastically change how the states and the federal government deal with this divisive hot button issue.
 
This battle is a fairly recent forefront issue that came in with Obama's catering and pandering to ubber vocal gay radicals for votes. An issue that is best left up to the people involved and their God, or at least left up to the individual states to decide, is now dividing our country and pitting those on the same conservative political side against each other...people like Carl Rove who thinks the Republican Party should accept gay marriage versus Mike Huckabee who says if they do that Evangelical Christians will leave the party.
 
Obama has cleverly succeeding in splitting our party once again.
 
But let's start with the word at the crux of this issue...marriage. Legally, to date, marriage is a sanctioned social union or legal contract between a man and a woman that establishes rights and obligations between the spouses, between the spouses and their children, and between the spouses and their in-laws. The definition of marriage might differ somewhat amongst different cultures, but it is primarily recognized by all as an institution in which interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged.
 
In our country, to be legally married, a man and woman does NOT have to have a religious ceremony.
 
However, a couple is only married in the eyes of God after they have participated in a formal religious wedding ceremony and after having gone through the legal process as well...one cannot be married religiously in our country without also being married legally.
 
And herein lies the crux of the problem...the religious feel being gay goes against the teachings of the Bible, while more liberal thinkers say one cannot control whom they fall in love with. The religious feel being gay is a sin, an abomination against God, that will force those 'who lay with man' (or woman in the case of lesbians) to spend eternity in hell. The more liberal thinkers say one's sexual preferences cannot be controlled, that one is born either heterosexual or homosexual and has NOTHING to do with their religious leanings or lack thereof whatsoever.
 
Both groups are right in their eyes and both groups are wrong in the other groups eyes...and so the battle rages on with the touch point issue of children being at the center of the differences between the two sides.
 
As an example, The American Psychological Association, American Medical Association, and the American Academy of Pediatrics all agree that there is NO scientific evidence that parenting effectiveness is related to parental sexual orientation, and that lesbian and gay parents are just as likely as heterosexual parents to provide supportive, healthy, and loving environments for their children.

The religious feel that children do NOT belong in same-sex households for it goes against specific teachings of the Bible. The first chapter of Genesis speaks of the creation of man and woman and includes the commandment, 'be fruitful and multiply.' But gay couples cannot multiply through sexual relations as straight couples do, and this is critical to the religious.

And then the religious will bring up the words of the second chapter where it says it's not good for a man to be alone so God created woman from his flesh. “This is now bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh. She shall be called Woman for she was taken out of Man. That is why a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife and they become one flesh.”

As in man clings to a woman NOT to another man.

But all this applies to religious interpretation alone...for more liberal thinkers, both on the right and on the left of the political spectrum, believe the issue of gay marriage to be simply an issue of equality under the law, under secular law, with equality meaning nothing more than treating ALL people alike...as in affording ALL people the same rights and privileges under the law...NO special treatment just equal treatment.

And herein lies the true crux of the battle as the religious jump in and say those who can produce children and those who can't are not alike under God's laws, case closed.

And the fundamental battle rages on and always will.

But if we look at this battle in strictly secular terms, and take the religious component completely off the table, what is it that committed gay couples really want...is it to be married with the dress, the tux, the flowers, the party...or is to have legal allowances made and put into law so that they can be with their partner as a family member in all legal matters just like that which is afforded to a traditional husband and wife...I believe this is what most committed gay couples want.

And as to my own personal beliefs on this issue...YES, I believe committed gay couples should have ALL legal protections afforded straight couples under the law but...and this is critical...DO NOT CALL IT MARRIAGE. Call it domestic partnerships...call it civil unions...call it committed partnerships...call it anything but marriage for our Judeo/Christian society defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman NOT a man and a man or a woman and a woman.

And if we are to be truly 'one nation under God'...something the vast majority of conservatives want us to be...I believe we have to separate the secular legalities of the gay marriage issue from the prejudice and judgmental attitudes some of the religious feel towards gays (God is the judge NOT us)...and we have to afford committed gay couples the same legal rights (NO more NO less) that ALL straight couples enjoy but we have to temper it with the Judeo/Christian tenets of our society by NOT calling gay unions marriage.

http://thepatriotfactor.blogspot.com/2013/03/op-ed-gay-marriage.html


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